True Forgiveness For Those Who Humble Themselves

Mark Strand tells of an experience that occurred following his first year of college.  His dad and mom had left for vacation, and Mark wrecked their pickup truck, crumpling the passenger-side door.  Returning home, he parked the truck.  When his dad returned home and saw the damage, Mark acted surprised and denied any knowledge of the accident.  Mr. Strand then asked the hired man about it, and to Mark's delight, the man admitted he was responsible.  He had heard a loud noise while passing the truck with the wings of the cultivator up, and now he assumed he had caused the damage.

But the weeks that followed were torturous as Mark struggled with his guilty conscience.  He repeatedly considered telling the truth, but was afraid.  Finally one day he impulsively blurted it out.

"Dad, there's something I need to tell you."

"Yes?"

"You know that pickup door?  I was the one who did it."

Dad looked at me.  I looked back at him.  For the first time in weeks I was able to look him in the eyes as the topic was broached.  To my utter disbelief, Dad calmly replied, "I know."

Silent seconds, which seemed like hours, passed.  Then dad said, "Let's go eat."  He put his arm around my shoulder, and we walked to the house, not saying another word about it.  Not then, not ever.

- Mark Strand, "I Couldn't Forget That Door," Decision (December 1996)